just · another · tear · on · my · pillow

I walk by him every day trying to forget the painess it causes me..I try to ignore him hes a jerk and I normaly hate those type of people but theirs somthing about him I just can't put my finger on and say oh hes so sweet when he's not being a jerk.I think he likes me too but why should I care hes just going to be another tear on my pillow...Tears That keep on coming.I can't stop thinking about him he's the boy I've always wanted to meat.He's not A bullie hes qwuite sweet and I have to relise that hes just a little scratch on my heart nothing more.But before I met him my life was fallin my heart was broken and just by his smile It all pulled back together.Besides I'm ugly I'm pathtic and I'm nothing like those other girls I'm one of those girls that sit their in their room writing in her diary spreading her thoughts who looks for a guy who calls me beutiful and can say to his friends thats her...Thats my amy.Not hot or chick.But he is falling for this girl who doesnt care for him inside but for his looks and is popularity and looks for stuff that can make her look good who wares all that makeup.I wont hide myself for a boy not again...it would be dream if he would say hello amy how are you? simple...But i'm not his type some may say but hes all that i wanted. he mite not be that cute but who cares he can hold you and say to you you'r the best thing thats happend to me your beutiful not hold your hand and say want french fries want to kiss your a clut pull your act together. but when I see him and he together My heart falls back into pieces and my life seems just cramped into a box.But when he smiles I feel as if god gave me beuty.I wonder each day will me and him ever be together...Will he notice me will people make fun of me will they know I'm not like them.I'm not a barbie doll looking like every one.i'm amy I'm my self and nothing will change that not even him..

dear that fire thats going out,
Thanks for always being their for me and telling me right from from for telling me That I'm not even worthy of stuff that you can do..Well i agree your not like me I folow my own path I will always be their but please what happend to the path you were on..?You are off track closing the bridge wont help. but folow your heart were it truley is..
love you always..kitty

As my piture says im strumming to find a melody for too,
I am looking for someone that I can talk to and they can just sit their nodding agreaing and why wont he or she find me im tierd or searching for that someone.I"m never going to find that someone but i'm searching for someone that wont tell anyone any thing or blans it out in the hallway or begs to tell somone or say dont wory shes not going to tell.Some one who will say thats for me to know only its important its my friend.I just hope im that person for someone.Some one got her heart broken today by someone and cries when ever she sees him and her a practical joke turning into a river of maddnes. but me ive sank low into the ocean..I mite have been eaten by a shark already but i dont know for sure but then I"d notice that the water im drowing in...I'ts my tears.nothing can stop them from falling now.Worrie fills my heart ever day will he and she be alright will i pass will someone make fun of me will i make friends will he like me should i go is he ok is she going to be alright whats wrong with her did i say somthing? they reapet through my mind every time i walk in the hall ways...Were am i somthimes travles their too..

Here I am again stuck in the heat and now in a fight with my cosin and my brother She acts as if shes my mom and he acts as if hes my dad which their not they shold act as them self for now on not as my perants and today is their aneversary.I'm not amazed that jolie and chris are yelling at me again and now ive sunk even deeper into the tar which I started in could any thing get worse?

Life is like a cadle their light when its lit and then theirs darkness on the hate and sadness and which part is she in is she in a dark swampy plase were your feet are stuck!Or a place were all your loved ones are having a picnic enjoying them selfs!Well this girl is in the darkness shes in a hall way alone with no light but people walk by her and dont look even at her they dont smile they dont blink they dont even say helo or whos that they walk away and around her she asks everyone that walks by her standing post help?help me please?But yet not even they know shes here she may stand alone and afraid and mabe even hurt but she never gives up but that girl is about to shes stuck in a tar that even her dad cant get through but she knows if she tries hard anough she will though she already knows again that she has no one helping her or guiding her to the candle that is not lit she stands alone as ever one laughs giggles and even throws stuff at her but he helps her and never gives up hes going but still trying hurting but still tryin how come she cant be like him how come thw world has to be so tuff the tar so hard and so mad and how does she know she'l make if through the hardest and mostb solid tar of all she stands alone but yet she doesnt...-

people dont relise how lucky they are... but the ones that do are angles the one that dont are no one, I wish we could all know if we were lucky or not I wish that the world was filled with kindness..I wish and i wish

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you. Wait for the one who turns to his friends and says, "...that's her."

The world was qwite once when only the sweet smell of the ocean and the ripple of the leaves crunch under your feet and the grass would move side to side left to right right to left to see what the new born babie was doing and the ocean waters crashing with anger at the rocks!And their was love made from the family which they shared intill the grass stoped moving and went to sleep the sun stoped staring down at us and the waters calmed down...and the sun set down for now the moon would gaze over the sucses that we made and the reck we made..